What Makes Someone…Undateable?

Screenshot 2015-04-15 13.54.32By: Kate Edwards, Three Day Rule Matchmaker

As a professional matchmaker for Three Day Rule, I live and breathe everything related to dating. So in the rare free time I have, even the television shows I watch revolve around people’s love lives. I simply can’t help myself! Last season, I got into NBC’s show “Undateable,” and with the second season just beginning, there’s a lot my clients can learn from the show.

Like a lot of sitcoms, Undateable chronicles a group of quirky friends who hang out at a local bar. But unlike most shows, Undateable pokes fun at every character’s dating mishaps, and shows us that every single person out there has something about them that makes them “undateable.”

So, what would I tell each character if they were my client? Here’s how I’d help turn the undateables into dateables. Sure, the show wouldn’t be as funny, but someone has seriously got to help these kids.

Justin – Can’t Get Over His Ex

Screenshot 2015-04-15 13.46.30Poor Justin, who can’t even have a successful one-night stand because he’s not over his ex. While I don’t advise one-night stands like Justin’s friends, it’s obvious that Justin has some major problems when it comes to getting back out there. First, he’s not over his ex, so he talks about her constantly. No woman wants to hear about your ex! We would rather stay home with Netflix. Second, when he does put himself out there, he’s still in relationship mode. He doesn’t know how to date casually, so he ends up scaring people away or diving in much too quickly.

Advice: Be casual about dating! Treat it like a hobby. It’s something you enjoy, its something you have to practice, but if you date like it’s not the only important thing in your life, you won’t come off as desperate or needy, like Justin. And never, ever talk about your exes on dates.

Candace – Acts Like a Doormat

Screenshot 2015-04-15 13.48.01Sweet, naïve Candace is new to the group of friends, and she’s still getting to know everyone. But it’s immediately apparent to her newfound friends that her boyfriend simply sucks. He walks all over her and takes her for granted, and Candace can’t see what a jerk he is. Worst of all, she gets mad when Justin confronts her about it!

Advice: Listen to your friends and read the signs. When one friends doesn’t like your boyfriend, that’s normal. When all of your friends don’t like your boyfriend, it might be time to think twice. Sometimes outsiders see what you can’t, so don’t get mad at them for speaking their minds. Only you can know who is right for you, but don’t be naïve, and always make sure your partner treats you well – you know you deserve it.

Danny – Jokes Around Too Much

Screenshot 2015-04-15 13.48.58No one takes Danny seriously. He’s a goofball, he’s a flirt, and he’s just not boyfriend material. He’s overly competitive, and as the comedic relief on the show, he’s always embarrassing himself in the name of a joke. Sure, he’s good-looking, but no one actually wants to date Danny. All we know about him is that he loves to have fun, but we don’t know that he has any substance at all. It’s hard for any woman to get behind that.

Advice: Have fun, but act like a grownup. Of course we love a good goofball. I have a soft spot for men with great senses of humor, and it’s good to not take yourself too seriously. But women need to see that a man is responsible, communicative, and strong, and Danny doesn’t show any of those traits. Show them your funny side, but make sure they know you’re a real person too. No one ends up with the class clown.

Leslie – Doesn’t See What’s In Front of Her

Screenshot 2015-04-15 13.49.38On the show, the nerdy character Burksi is blatantly in love with Leslie. He even tells her he would agree to never talk to her again if she would just kiss him once. Leslie is dismissive, and rejects his advances. She’s making one of the biggest mistakes we see with our clients – ignoring the good ones that are right in front of you. Maybe he’s her future soulmate, but she’ll never know because she’s a tough cookie who is not open to dating a nerd.

Advice: Remember it doesn’t come in the package you expect. Ask any married friend if their spouse looks like they thought he or she would. Most married people will tell you that they fell for something completely different than they thought they would. Perhaps they always dated the bad boy, but ended up with the tech entrepreneur. Or they always dated fancy lawyers, but they ended up with a kind policeman. You never know what your partner is going to look like, and you have to be open to looking in unexpected places.

All of the characters seem like hopeless messes, but they aren’t! They make the same mistakes most people do, and with these simple fixes, they might have a fighting chance. No matter what, the show is a funny take on the types of challenges we see every day, so it’s worth a watch.

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