By: Erika Gershowitz, Three Day Rule Matchmaker
As matchmakers, we spend our days meeting tons of eligible bachelors and bachelorettes who confide in us what they’re looking for, and task us with the job of seeking it out. One of the most common things that both men and women look for is a potential partner with some sort of “edge.”
Women call it an edge; men call it a passion. Essentially, they mean the same thing: everybody wants to be with somebody who has something that makes him or her tick.
The word “edge” can be intimidating to most men working in Corporate America, medicine, or any profession that doesn’t involve leather jackets as uniform or motorcycle as a means to commute. But the truth is, edginess certainly doesn’t mean tattoos and motorcycles – it just means a tangible something that makes you unique.
At some point or another, online profiles all start to look the same and everyone’s “stats” start blending together — another blonde, another lawyer, another just-below-6-foot guy. It’s so important to personify yourself — a resume, your height and your age only go so far and nobody believes in “good on paper” anymore. Do you play the piano? Now you’re the lawyer who has a knack for music. Do you truly enjoy cooking? Now your potential date can daydream about the Italian meal you might cook up for them one day. At the end of the day, our passions are often the most tangible relationship builders we have to offer, so don’t forget to flaunt them.
We meet people all the time who describe their hobbies as “going to brunch, walking around the city, and hanging with friends,” but once we ask them to dig a little deeper, it surfaces that they volunteer, love the ballet and are currently taking improv classes. These are the kinds of passions that make for an interesting conversation, not the brunch spot you eat egg white omelettes at every single Sunday.
In big cities, it’s so easy to get caught up doing a little bit of a lot of things, but it’s important to foster interests and focus on improving upon those interests.
People love to see potential matches that are not only passionate, but non-complacent — someone who always likes to learn and improve.
When you are single, you should seize that time to find yourself and pick up a hobby that excites you — it’s one more thing you can bring to the table when you find your match!
A good relationship is built to last, so start by being an interesting first date. We all want to be with someone who is both exciting and excited.
Find your edge, leverage it, and embrace it!